My first epic poem

This is called "Epic Poem"

 

Show me the

not money

Cuba Gooding Castro in Reeboks

Harry Potter and the Infinite Sadness

Snape Potter and the Power Windows

The popcorn machine in my office

makes

popcorn

not

wise decisions

Mr. Dick makes wise decisions

Have yourself measured for a suit of clothes directly

Your mom really does go to college

Scene

 

I know you probably haven't read an epoch poem before, so I'll explain a bit.  You take a bunch of stuff that only make sense to you, mess around with the punctuation, throw in some of your own opinions and try really hard to sound authoritative and finally add in some commentary on popular culture to bolster your credibility on the internet.  And that's how you make a blog.  I mean epoch poem.  Why so serious.

I've switched google engines

I've used many google engines in my days.  Webcroogle, Yahoogle, Alta Voogle, Askoogle.com, Excoogle, HotBoogle, Northern Loogle, Ask Joogle, Lycoogle and Infosoogle.  But there have been others as well.  The point is that I don't rely soley on Google.com for my googles anymore.  There is another google engine that already made some waves and is now listed pretty much as a causality in the war on time travel.  It's called Cuil.com or Cuioogle.com for short, but that link doesn't work.  When you perform a google using Cuil.com, you will be presented with a page of relevent google results.  Why so serious.  It's different, but think different.  Just like Apple iPods.

It's not what the people pay to see

I keep getting angry calls from my agent saying that my paying customers aren't getting out what they put in to this blog.  I said, "You are correct agent, people put money into this blog, I do not give it back to them."  She said "You're so funny, I can't even remember why I was angry.  Have a great afternoon."  But I would like to try and rectify this problem.  You, as paying customers, expect a certain level of understandment and truthfulisms in this blog.  And I, as the author, expect that I will receive huge sums of money and accolades for my viewpointed and opinionals.  But to some, this is not enough.  Beyond money and accolades, there lies power.  And that is the real reason to do anything.  Power.  Windpower, electric, nuclear, it's all important.  Go green.  Why so serious. 

A new character

I was watching the only show worth watching last night, Life.  At the end of the episode, which was good, they announced that some other girl would be joining the cast, some black girl.  I've never heard of her, nor do I care.  So in honor of wrecking a good thing with adding something extra, I've decided that I'm going to adding new characters, I mean, authors to this blog.  The first one's name is Why So Serious.  In other news, the point is what is best in life?  Other than the Conan answer, which is the right answer, people always wreck stuff by adding something extra.  One extra fish tail to the chilidog, one extra cooking reality show to the primetime lineup, one extra shrek movie full of obsolete pop culture references, one extra fan brush to beat the devil out of, one extra little roll of paint, one extra happy little tree, one extra halo game, one extra wii and all the crappy games on the wii that everyone buys and nobody plays, one extra crappy wii graphics, one extra hybrid synergy drive, one extra nigerian email scammer conference, one extra bejeweled on ps3 is so fun, one extra so is Killzone 2 and Little Big Planet, one extra why so serious why so serious, one extra you get the idea, one extra alien movie, one extra harry potter book, well I think you get the idea.  If you have to add something extra to make it better, the point is, never try.

Blog of the title post is what is the post is.

I've decided that in an unlikely turn of events, the 4th age of blogging has begun.  I've consulted with my many many snooty, self-important, boring, overpaid, hermitized shuddin professional blogging friends and they've come to same conclusion that I have.  There are some of these professional blogger friends who maintain that the fourth age has already begun with the beginning of the Tournament.  But until Shang Tsung says "It has begun", will the trans-dimensional city of Gummadoon appear and the Gummi Bears will spring forth and the 4th age of blogging will commence.  In science news, I read on a science blog called "Scienceland" that if you hit someone's back when they are making a face, not only will their facial features get frozen (which is common knowledge) but If you're still reading at this point, well, sorry.

Yogos 2: The Hunger

I have some yogos at my house.  And even though they almost fall into the same category as food with any kind of *.ables in the name, they are a fine treat if you like fake yogurt and fruit snacks.  I wrote something earlier today about something and that's fine.  The point is that professional blogging makes even less sense than professional gaming.  In fact blogging in general makes even less sense than your average Andrew Lloyd Weber Broadway Musicaltastrophe.  Because we all know that West Side Story is the only authentic piece of authentic Shakespearean era Shakespeare left.  Ba da da da da Ba da da da da da da wah wah wah wah.  Dance fighting is a new category in the winter olympics this August in Teotihuacan.  I expect to see great things from Andrew Lloyd Weber this August.  Terrible;.> yes;:, but ? great^.

Why so serious?

I say that because at the end of the day, if this blog isn't bringing in the big hits, it's not living up to it's potential and that reflects upon the entire Gem state.  And so I have inserted a popular cultural catchphrase from pop culture to put my blog higher in the Goobler page rank system.  Actually that reminds me of a funny part in the latest batman movie.  The jokerman was talking to one of his henchmans and they were talking about ponies.  The henchman said "I like ponies" and then the jokerman said, hahahaa, he said, hahahahaha, hold on I have to stop laughing long enough to type what the jokerman said, he said hoohoohaaahahahoho, he said "I like ponies too."  And then after the ponies conversation, the batman and the jokerman were talking about who is hotter, Alfred or the jokermanmobile.  Oh Heath, we barely knew you, except for all the other bad movies you were in.  Everyone said they could barely recognize you in the movie.  I wonder if that had anything to do with the layers of makeup, face paint, fake hair and your different accent.  If only there could have been another Knights Tale.  It could have been called "A Knights Tale Too:  Even Worse Than The First One."  I think if he had been cast in "The Host" it would have been like, even better.