Interstellar War with a side of global annihilation

If I have learned one thing in all my years from instigating interstellar war, it is this:  I was right about Jared Fogle, along with basically everyone else that has ever met that guy.  But I was also right about Guy Ferrari.  Not that he's a perv, but that he's not a chef.  And that brings us to our final point.  If Guy Fantasmic continues to have a show on cable television, we are doomed.  Not just in the ratings war, but as a species.  We cannot survive another Guypocalpyse.  And seriously, the dude is not a chef.  And seriously, some dude named Adam Richland, who's held just about every position in the restaurant business who is specifically not a competitive eater qualifies him to have his own show about competitive eating which depicts him eating competitively?  Please FoodNetwork, if could just shut down yourself and cancel all your programming, that would be great.  Terrible, but great.